Here I am, 34 years old and about to start giving myself shots.
I don’t like doctors and avoid medicine most times. I pride myself on answering “not applicable” when a form asks me what medicines I currently take. It’s not that I don’t believe in science; I rather enjoy allowing nature and my natural body to heal itself. Luckily, I was born into a body that has been healthy and naturally self-sustaining, and I am grateful for my (knock on wood) healthy, physical state. That said, I am choosing to move forward into the great, big, cold world of fertility. Wonder how I got to this point? So do I.
If I were to say I fully embraced the egg freezing option, I would be lying.
It’s been my sister, who just happens to be a nurse in the fertility field, who for years has been whispering in my ear about fertility options. She works for the Baby GodFather (this is what we shall call him) at Shady Grove Fertility. SGF is a well-established fertility center that has been working in fertilization since the ‘90s and has helped bring more than 30,000 babies to the world. Although babies are more of a future goal for me, I am merely taking a proactive approach or something like that.
Ever since I turned 30, my sis suggested I should consider egg freezing.
She said that by the time I find “the one” and go through the phases of a relationship, my eggs would only be getting older. Egg freezing would be an insurance plan so I wouldn’t have to rush and feel pressure to move along relationships. Although I didn’t want to admit it, she had a point.
Her words and the stories other women have shared about their regrets as–well as my own dang birthdays that keep coming faster–got me thinking. And thinking. And thinking. Until that day, I actually made up my mind.
Once you decide to freeze your eggs, the rest is history.
Like most things in life, it’s the decision that takes the longest.
It’s the mental mind game that takes time, patience, acceptance and a lowering of resistance and allowing of the unknown to take over. For some people, this might take a week, a few months or maybe even a year. For me, it’s taken a lot longer.
For anyone out there who thinks egg freezing is a “trend,” please consider how shallow this sounds.
I have taken yoga classes to find my zen about this process. I traveled to an ashram for 10 days to journal and find my inner voice on this decision. After debating for four years about the process, it is clearly a decision I struggled with. When I finally flipped over and floated (and turned 34!), is when I stopped fighting and starting allowing. I allowed the progress of human nature and human intelligence to help me along with my journey.
Calling this a trend makes this process quite superficial and out of touch with the responsibilities a woman has to make. It’s a deep decision, one that takes inner thought, healing and peace before the real journey begins. It’s quite multidimensional, requiring future decisions to be made as well.
With that said, I am excited for the process to start, for the egg retrieval to happen and then to be with myself after the procedure. What will I feel? Will I judge myself for going through with it and not waiting for God and the universe to provide a natural process into familyhood? Or will I feel a lot lighter? Knowing that a part of my 34-year-old self is frozen in time? Will I be able to allow my world and myself some space about this topic, until things (and maybe a man) synch up a little better in my world?
Overall, I hope I will tread more gracefully, knowing the progress of science has allowed me (and other women) to make smarter decisions and personal progress toward being responsible for the impact of child-bearing. How healthy is this? I think it’s a lot more meaningful to think about this now and plan for the future, instead of reacting to life and just waiting and wishing for things to happen.
The shots start soon and the journey moves onward. Stay tuned.
AUTHOR: Radell Peischler
Radell Peischler shares the egg freezing story with as many women that will listen. Radell also helps coach women to figure out if egg freezing is right for them. She believes it’s always the right time for a yoga break and carrying around a small dog or two, oh …. and loves the quote, “the world will be saved by the western woman” (Dalai Lama’s words, not hers)!